Eid is great for a lot of people. Ramazan’s over, which leaves you free to return to your gluttonous ways. You get to meet people you may not have met in a while. You get to show off your new joras and boast about how you managed to get it sewn to perfection at the last minute.
However, there exists a breed of people who aren’t exactly huge fans of Eid. If you’re from that rare, underground subgroup, here are a bunch of reasons why you are this way:
You don’t get the hype
Every year, people talk about Eid like it’s some mega event that will set the benchmark for all events and you just don’t understand how that’s so, considering it’s like any other social event.
You really don’t like Eid prep
Mehndi? Shopping? Yeah, no. You’re probably not a huge fan of being ripped off for stuff that stinks, dries up and dirties your house and bed and basically impairs your physical abilities in the process. And shopping isn’t exactly a prospect that excites you. If anything, Eid prep is a huge inconvenience.
Getting dressed up is a huge chore
If you’re used to roaming in your night suit all day long, you’ll resent anyone who tells you to change and put on respectable clothing. And if you don’t, prepare your ass for a huge lecture, especially if you’re still in your night suit when your guests arrive.
You’re not too keen on helping out around the house
To be fair, it wasn’t your idea to invite guests in the first place. Does your ammi care, though? Hell no.
”Sab kaam main karoon. Jab main nahi hongi toh yaad karna.”
– An ancient Ammi proverb
Eid gets pretty boring at times
Every year, you mentally prepare yourself for what a drag Eid will eventually turn out to be. And every year, you’re proven right.
You’re not a big fan of visits or visitors
If you’re a lethargy stricken pile of zero energy, chances are that you hate going out and having to socialize or putting on a hospitable front when people visit. You’d rather sleep or binge watch your favorite show.
You hate how your parents act around visitors
Visiting relatives gets extremely awkward. Your parents will probably lie about your GPA to make you seem smarter than you are. They’ll probably brag about accomplishments that aren’t technically yours. Basically, they’ll put you up on display. And if someone shows up to your house? Yeah, you should probably have your room cleaned in advance and be awake at the crack of dawn to prepare for visitors who will probably arrive about six to seven hours later. And don’t even think about touching the food in front of them. You’re only worthy of the leftovers.
You usually don’t get Eidi
There is nothing worse than a visitor who leaves without giving Eidi. Itna chota dil kisi ka nahi hona chahiye. People who don’t give Eidi (except for those who can’t afford to) are Satan’s special breed, whom he unleashes as soon as Ramazan is over to continue wreaking havoc.
People don’t understand how or why you don’t like Eid
You’re deemed a hater, but nobody really gets why you’re not a fan of Eid. People think you’re putting on a bitter front to stand out, when all you’re really doing is expressing an opinion. People call you out on it all the time and think they’re helping by doing so, but it only further aggravates that dislike.
Regardless, Eid is an auspicious event that many look forward to, even if you don’t. Over the years, you’ve learned to respect the love people have for this event, overlook the hype and ignore the seemingly baseless excitement that it brings. After all, it’s just three days and at the end of the day, it’s a holiday. That excites your lazy ass more than anything else.
Eid preparations mubarak, everyone.
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