Being a desi Sushi lover is not easy at all. You get to hear snide comments about liking firangi food (that is not even firangi to begin with) that is probably not even halal. Cherry on the top, people equate your love for Sushi with how well you can use the chopsticks. Needless to say, you never fulfill the standards of a sophisticated sushi lover and end up eating with your bare hands with soy sauce dripping down your fingers.

If you are a desi sushi lover and this feels familiar, here are some of the struggles you go through when you go out to eat Sushi:

1. You friends consider you pagal or saeein for liking raw, uncooked food. 

“Issay tou kuch bhi mil jaye kha leti hai.”

2. Getting to hear “Tauba! Kia kachi machli khati rehti ho?” every time you go out to eat Sushi. 

3. You are always being inquired about Sushi’s halal/haram status by your parents and friends alike. 

“Main ne suna hai yeh halal nai hoti?”

4. You always prefer eating with your hands and fingers because using chopsticks is too mainstream.

Also, because you really do not know how to use them.

5. Even though you are quite aware of the wasabi burns, you still prefer taking huge amounts of it at once only to challenge your desi tastebuds.

6. You just can’t figure out the orange colored ginger’s role in a sushi platter but you enjoy it anyway because Adrak… Omnomnom!

7. You watch around ten 5-minute videos about ‘How to eat Sushi’ or ‘How to use chopsticks’ on YouTube, every time you’ve to go out with your significant other.

8. You fake-fight with whoever is accompanying you to the sushi bar, using your chopsticks because it is not like you are going to use them for eating anyway. 

9. You don’t and never will understand what nori sheets are or how to even pronounce them.

10. Whenever the green tea is being served at the end, you pray for it to magically turn into chai or some lemon drink because you just cannot keep the desi inside you, in control. 

11. And finally, if the sushi’s going into your mouth and you are thoroughly enjoying it, it is all good.

Here’s a bunch 0f fellow desis trying Sushi for the first time