Desi parents have been the epitome of a mountain-load of expectations since forever. A flying chooti and a chittar is the national response to a B grade in many Pakistani household which means children grow up under a lot of pressure. For many, their futures are about engineering or medicine, the only two respectable ‘technical’ professions despite the 21st century. As if all this wasn’t enough, they are constantly pitted against khala shakeela’s son or phupho nabila’s daughter or uncle razzaq’s daughter-in-law’s husband’s brother’s son. You get the idea. Comparisons are drawn, children’s achievements are thrown around carelessly between sips of evening tea and the objective is always to be the best in everything.
One Pakistani school principal decided to advise the parents against this toxic behavior.
Mrs. Talat Feroz from the Dar-E-Arqam School in Islamabad wrote a heart-warming letter to desi parents just before the commencement of first term exams.
“I know you all are anxious for your child’s best progress, but please do remember that every individual cannot be the master of all areas”, the letter implored after announcing the guidelines to be followed before assessing each student’s intelligence and capabilities.
There is a Quran learner whose Chemistry marks won’t matter.
There is an artist, who doesn’t need to understand Math.
There is an entrepreneur, who can’t be the master of History or English Literature.
There is a sports person whose physical fitness is more important than Physics.
The letter goes on to remind desi parents about how every child is unique in his/her own right and parents should be mindful of their capabilities before setting impossible benchmarks that only end up in heartbreak. These expectations often result in high and low functioning depression, hurls at the child’s self-esteem and shatters their confidence at a very early age.
“Kindly do not think that doctors and engineers are the only happy people in the world”, Mrs. Feroz wrote as a conclusion to the letter.
This was adapted from a Singaporean school principal’s letter that was posted on 9GAG and consequently went viral but it is important to note the effort made by a local administrator to try and play a part in changing perspectives.
