Flight experience mostly relies on who is flying with you, and as always we Pakistanis provide a huge array of possible flight partners. Some good and mostly bad!
Here are some of the most interesting albeit a little(or a lot) irritating passengers you’ve surely come across on your travels:
1. The obsessive phone users
You all know this rule of flying- no phones. And even if you didn’t the crew mentions it at least 5 times before take-off. But where there are Pakistanis, no rules can be followed. The person next to you is willfully giving running commentary of the take-off to their mom on the other end, while you’re sitting horrified, praying that the mama ka laadla doesn’t cause a plane crash.
2. “Let’s be friends”
If you’re seated next to them, all nice and comfy, they ATTACK! Usually starts with a simple salaam and awkward exchanges, then they get really personal. Kids? If no,why?
Business? Job? Who do you work for? Boss acha hai? Suna hai wahan baray paisay bunte hai?
3. The loud sleeper
Everyone has at some point in their lives slept on a plane. It’s perfectly normal and accepted behavior but then you meet this one person, who pushes the extremes. Sleep usually escalates to snoring and snoring moves up to said person leaning on you and invading your space.
4. The ‘bhai zarra ye kaisay karna hai’
This person can’t figure out how the earphones work, or how the entertainment system works or how the table works or how to lean your seat back. You want to have peaceful flight so you avoid eye contact at all costs.
5. The babies – real ones
Babies will always seem cute and playful till the plane takes off. After that, all hell breaks loose. You sit there through out the journey wondering why do babies hate planes so much that they want to torture everyone in it.
6. The over-dressed clan
There’s always this one family who seem “Shaadi-Ready” when they board the plane. Sequins, gold, makeup, suit and ties galore! Empathize with these people because most likely they don’t yet understand how uncomfortable their flight is going to be. PJs on the airplane, people.
7. The neighbor who always has to jump over you
The curse of the aisle seat is the small bladder-ed neighbor. Washroom visits are quite often and plentiful. This person won’t let you read or watch a movie in peace. It’s as if their personal mission is to cause you discomfort.
8. The invader
These people don’t see the difference between a plane seat and their sofa back home. They usually sit khul kar while eating away at your space. Space invasion levels through the roof.
9. The fighters
While boarding, they don’t care whose bag is in the overhead compartment, they’ll throw all other bags around the plane just to make space for their bag which cannot qualify for hand baggage.
10. The air hostess fanboys
They’ll press the call button way too many times that anyone would stop believing it’s by mistake anymore. They will also start unnecessary small talk and you can’t help feel for the air hostess. Sometimes they can have the hardest jobs in the world.
11. The boozer boys
In most international flights, they’ll be one person who will chug down at least 2 glasses of red wine and maybe some beer too. This person is out to enjoy the flight to the fullest. However the immigration officers at Pakistani airports usually spot the drinkers and give the poor folks a hard time, to say the least.
12. The eager beavers
It’s understandable, when you land you have the urge to stand up because it’s been long and uncomfortable. Some people just take it too far. The following war of air hostesses and passengers is quite a fun show to see play out. Grab your popcorn.
13. The occasional good neighbor
You seem to get along with this person and it’s the perfect bonding for a flight. They’re super cool and incredibly nice- if you get one of these your flight will be amazing.
At the end of the day, your flight will be entertaining as heck and you’ll have a great story to tell when you see your friends. Everyone loves stories of bad fellow passengers.
